BJJ Black Belt Competitor Killed in Road Rage incident

[Van Canna]

Hoshin

what it shows, for us as martial artists is that what is traditionally called a "win" may not be the best outcome. it is one outcome of many.

True. It can be a matter of semantics but it generally there is a 'foundation of expectations' that insidiously insinuates in a martial artist's mind...that makes him huff and strut...even if only inside himself...and even if consciously unaware.

Look at how many people we may have known who almost daily would love the opportunity to take someone on, to prove to themselves they are the real thing.

We have seen this here on my forum as well...

And these same people always take the occasion of slamming fellow practitioners in the dojo so they can acquire 'bragging rights'...

But then when real violence 'comes acalling' they seem to easily melt into a casket.

[Van Canna]

Watch how we make these mistakes in a real fight.

https://youtu.be/aqn6cy3jB0k

[Van Canna]

In particular, watch how you can get 'knifed' moving in to close the distance so you can play the 'closet game'...

[Van Canna]

Rick Wilson, in his book:Watch out for the Pointy end covers the tactical distance in close quarters...

Buy the book and you will see why in so many cases, when you watch a typical class, it will dawn on you that we generally know nothing about facing a potential armed opponent.

[Van Canna]

“To become dangerous to a master of the art, a fighter's inexperience--and therefore, his unpredictability--would sometimes serve as well as an equal or superior level of skill.

That's why the fencing books and duelling tracts throughout the centuries tend to warn against the naturalists and the "unferme" fencers--amateurs whose unorthodox way of handling their weapons made them as dangerous as champions to the duellist.”

“Even the best fencer should never forget that in dangerous situation weaker characters can be driven into a condition of raging courage by the thought of impending annihilation. (...)

History has shown that even experienced tournament fencers, who even had passed several duels victoriously, succumbed to inferior opponents only because they felt secure and superior.”

[Van Canna]

'Cockiness. .. will get you killed'

"Everybody's scared," Mann says. "If you ain't scared, you're cocky, and that's the cockiness that will get you killed."

[Stryke]

Many don't ever learn the lesson

Do you want to get what you want? Or do you want to be right.

Often proving your right means giving up what you want.

Trust me I learnt the hard way. Its a lesson across life.


Most think it's the same thing.

Do you want to go home safe? Or do you want to win and teach the guy a lesson.

And don't confuse your martial sport or cultural pastime for a martial art.

Do you pass the reasonable man test , and have they failed it ?

[Van Canna]

Good post Marcus and all very sensible. Your post mirrors my feelings about 'expectations' that I have discussed before...expectations that have a way of morphing into 'assumptions'...in many insidious ways.

[Van Canna]

Stryke

Do you want to go home safe? Or do you want to win and teach the guy a lesson.

This is a hard one to control because it falls prey to 'emotional high-jacking' fused to 'vigilante behavior' lying in wait as a coiled snake...anger.

For example: Driving a car produce events and incidents that are sources of psychological forces capable of producing powerful feelings and irrational thought sequences.

Similarly, any martial art being studied producing successful goals of proficiency in many of its aspect, becomes symbolically associated with self esteem promoting an attitude of defensiveness and territoriality.

[Van Canna]

Stryke

Do you pass the reasonable man test , and have they failed it ?

Many times we fail in this, again because of the emotional 'jacking'...

https://www.psychologytoday.com/files/a ... hijack.pdf

Famous Amygdala Hijacks:

First let’s look at some of the famous hijacks and the results of these.
This is easier than examining our own.

1. Zidane’s head butt:
In front of 28.8 million viewers in 213 countries Zinedine
Zidane, a world-wide soccer role model, lost his self-control and
head butted Marco Materazzi in 2006 World Cup Soccer finals.
Zidane was kicked out of the game. France lost the World Cup.

[Van Canna]

Zidane’s career ended in disgrace and wonderment
“what was he thinking?” Again, he wasn’t.

Zidane’s surprising and aggressive response demonstrates the
three signs of the “amygdala hijack”: strong emotional reaction,
sudden onset, and regret for your actions when you reflect
later.

Zidane apologized to the children for his act, but remained
unrepentant to Materazzi and rationalized that Materazzi’s
statements provoked him.

Zidane’s comments demonstrate the
seriousness of his high profile hijack.

His logic was suppressed
by the powerful tunnel vision survival reaction of the amygdala.

No one can make you do something against your better
judgment, but the amygdala always can.

There went the 'reasonable man' right out of the world window.

[Van Canna]

Zidane rationalized later that he knew there were only minutes
left in his last career game and Materazzi response demanded
retaliation.

He was not thinking logically at that time and his
response characterizes what we call “cognitive dissonance” in
explaining his behavior.

In other words, there must have been a
good reason to do something so stupid in front of 28.8 million
viewers.

think of the many times in our lives we have sort of mirrored Zidane's behavior...

no one is immune as much as they might think so....and often a proficiency in a martial art heightens this risk.

I have investigated dozens upon dozens of workplace violence, as an example, where the perpetrators would talk to me in a dumbfounded state of mind, unable to understand what had come over them that had now destroyed their lives.

[Van Canna]

2. Eliot Spitzer Sex scandal:
Eliot Spitzer, the governor of New York who made his name as an
aggressive prosecutor of corporate fraud and organized crime had
to resign in disgrace in 2008 for being personally involved in a
prostitution ring.

These prostitutes charged up to $3100 an hour.

The graduate from Princeton and Harvard Law School obviously
was very smart, but the pleasure and irrationality of the amygdala
overtook his rational thinking of consequences and impacts on his
career and family. “What was he thinking?”

$3100 an hour just to get laid? Maybe this is what they teach at Harvard?

[Van Canna]

4. Mike Tyson biting Evander Holyfield’s ear in their 1993 title
boxing match. His hijack cost him $3million and lost his boxing
license.

5. Enron’s executives numerous hijacks over their tenure ended
with many in jail with plenty of time for better thinking.

Where did my IQ Go?

Any strong emotion, anxiety, anger, joy, or betrayal trips off the
amygdala and impairs the prefrontal cortex’s working memory.

The
power of emotions overwhelms rationality. That is why when we are
emotionally upset or stressed we can’t think straight.

Again, think of the morons I needed to cyber flush on this forum over the years.

[Van Canna]

The Emotional Audit

A leadership tool that can help with both self awareness and selfmanagement
is called the “Emotional Audit.”

It is designed to ask
strategic questions and that can change the focus when a person is
emotionally charged or about to get hijacked. When you are counting
to ten to calm down ask these questions to better direct your brain’s
thinking.

This audit is helpful, especially if you are feeling “triggered” by
someone or something. Wait 5 seconds till you get answer to each
question.

To build your self-awareness and self-management, use
the audit numerous times during the day. You may notice certain
patterns you have to what triggers you, how you are feeling and how
you get in your way.