The attack you asked about was (from a boss), "WHY are YOU LATE every single morning??! WHY can't you get here on TIME once in a while??!" It's two VAPs in a row -- two examples of the same pattern. The open attack (the bait) in the first one is the presupposition that you're late every mo...

I don't want you to think that I'm ignoring your questions -- that's not my intention. I think that if you check some of the other threads in this forum you'll find that I've been posting answers which are directly relevant to the questions you've asked. Please let me know if you disagree.

Suzette

It seems to me that the answers I've posted this morning (February 5th) to the other questions on the VSD forum probably apply to this question as well. I'm not going to add anything more at this time, therefore; I'll watch what you have to say over the coming week, and will welcome your questions a...

I have to do a preliminary warble here, because the message brings in an array of items that can't all be addressed at once. I don't mean to ignore parts of the question -- just to postpone them, so that there can be some clarity. Let me get the Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP) thing out of the way...

The question was: "Is it possible to define commonly-used martial arts terms in a way that will allow us all to discuss specific and unique aspects of a style without getting into a religious-type argument?" Followed by the accurate observation from another respondent that these "reli...

It's not the case that people who come to me as students or clients always do so because they're aware that others are verbally attacking them. Some do, of course, and begin their relationship with me by saying that verbal abuse is making their lives miserable -- but that's by no means universal. A ...

I've been dropping by for a few minutes each day to get a feeling for where this forum is headed -- getting my feet wet, as it were. I'm glad to see this thread started, but warn you that it's one of the hardest subject you could possibly take up. I'll be back tomorrow with answers to the questions,...

I don't want to belabor this topic, since the forum is about verbal self-defense rather than about feminism. I'll try to be brief, and then we can move on. I am convinced that all this alleged male/female dichotomy is a red herring, and that the differences we think we perceive are tied not to biolo...

The reference in the letter you quoted is to something called the "muted group" theory. For women (for the moment, let's say that that means women who are fluent speakers of English), it has been proposed that the need to express their thoughts/perceptions in English makes them a muted gro...